Sex Begins in the Kitchen

Whilst perusing my friend's bookcase for a new read, I was grabbed by the somewhat bizarrely titled 'Sex Begins in the Kitchen'. Far from shying away from admitting they owned the book, Neil and Sue actually recommended it, and so began a week of reading, with Claire, a book that is all about marriage relationships. So much of it jumped out at me that I thought I would keep notes here. I am about halfway through the book, and here are the bits that have been really good so far:

1) Men don't just need sex, they need to be wanted sexually
2) We often become the sort of spouse that our gender specific parent was, so can look at their example to see where we are likely to 'go wrong', and what we are going to need to work on.
3) By marrying a middle child, I married someone who will struggle to express their true feelings, and will often seem to go along with something but actually need pressing to find her true opinion on the issue.
4) As a 'carrot-seeker' who gets a lot of his worth out of the affirmation of others, I need to take time out, get out of the house and do things for myself only on a regular basis.
5) People have affairs because their partner is not giving them a certain thing in the relationship; if you meet all their needs then your spouse will have no reason to cheat on you.
6)HIS needs are sexual fulfilment,respect and the need to be needed
HER needs are affection that doesn't lead to sex, honest and open communication and commitment to the family (kids).
7) MY love languages (the way I like to receive love) are physical touch and words of affirmation.
Claire's love languages are quality time and acts of service. Acts of service is going beyond the norm of what you normally do e.g. go to work for me, or cook and clean for Claire. Those are not acts of service, but the norm!
8) I need to communicate with Claire - show an interest in what she is interested in, actively listen, give her my undivided attention and ask her opinion of things.

Well, it's all a bit open this forum, but it's a good way for me to keep notes and it might interest someone in the book!